Monday, February 28, 2011

And the result is in . . .

As previously said, I've been going through a really bad patch, health-wise, and had to ask for an extension for my TMA 04, as I'd spent the previous few weeks to it so ill I couldn't study. 

Having been given that time, I made a really concerted effort to get my TMA done, and I managed it, finishing it just over 2 1/2 days past the due-by date.

I didn't hold out much hope of getting more than a pass, and would have been more than happy with that, to be honest but, much to my shock, I looked online a couple of days back, and saw that I'd passed, and with a brilliant (for me) pass mark!

To be honest, I had to keep checking that I hadn't managed to sign in on someone else's account by mistake but, sure enough, it was my own.

I believe the old-fashioned phrase for how I felt is, utterly flabbergasted! {grin}

I'm not quite sure how this is working, with me being out of my head with pain most of the time recently, but still getting great marks - unless it's that, with the forefront of my thinking processes being out of action, the instinctive part of the brain - that has all of the knowledge, but is distracted by the mundane things in life getting in the way - has made different connections, and now has a chance to shine for a change?

I really haven't a clue but, as long as this downer in my health is continuing, I just hope that, whatever it is, it keeps on working! Lol

Sunday, February 20, 2011

A bit late, but better late than never!

For only the second time since I started studying with the Open University, I got to the point where I wasn't sure that I'd be able to post a TMA!

But, after an appalling few weeks, health-wise, I've actually managed to post my TMA 04 yesterday!
I can't tell you how relieved I was to see the back of it - 2 1/2 days late but, as I said, better late than never!

I actually thought at one point that I'd never get it done, as I've spent the last few weeks either curled up in a ball of agony, with an awful migraine attack added to my other woes (triggered by this stupid virus I'm suffering with, I'm sure), or else sleeping for Britain!

What I did post wasn't my best work, by any means, but I knew that, if I didn't post it then, I wouldn't do so at all, as this fatigue thing is getting worse :(

Ever since I had swine flu, in October, 2009, I've had issues with fatigue and then, getting another virus around Christmas time, I now feel as if I'm spending the majority of my life sleeping :(
I've gone from barely getting any sleep at all, because of pain, to not being able to stay awake for any more than 3 hours (if I'm lucky) in any 24 - and this, despite the pain!

Viruses really do have a lot to do with it, I'm sure and, as soon as my doctor is back in the surgery (hopefully, some time next week), hubby's taking me there, to see if there are any tests that can be done, to find out what the virus is, and if there's something I can take that will get rid of it, and help to wake me up a bit :(

And in the meantime, I'm now a week behind on the course-work but, also for the first time, I'm not going to fret over it! 
I'm going to do what I can, when I can, and try to get my health sorted out before anything else for once!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Diary of a Benefit Scrounger: Open letter to Maria Miller

Diary of a Benefit Scrounger: Open letter to Maria Miller: "Dear Maria Miller, Before I start, I have a small request. When you talk about 'The Disabled' could you please add 'The Sick' in there some..."

Thursday, February 10, 2011

- but mainly downs . . .

It's been a very trying time for me this last few weeks. 

Because of my problems with this virus - one that seems to want to make a permanent home with me - I've had more and more difficulty in doing the work on Block 4. 
So much so, that I had to give in and email my tutor, to let her know how far behind I'm getting :(

I've now got migraines coming on every few days, no doubt triggered by the virus, as Hubby's been getting rotten headaches with the virus, too and, as I used to get migraines all the time at one point, I guess there's a weakness there that the virus triggered again :(

Anyway, I got a lovely email back from my tutor, who basically advised me to try Option 2 for this TMA, as the question is much clearer and, as she also gave me a week's extension, so that I could catch up some, I decided to have a go.

As I can only come online for half-an-hour-ish at a time, or risk triggering another migraine, it hasn't been easy to begin my new option, but I did manage to do some research into Children's Book Awards; who judges them, and the criteria for that judging, so I feel as if I've at last started towards getting the info I need for the TMA!

My tutor made a comment in her email, about how I'm so hard on myself where dealing with the work I need to is concerned, and it made me think - and I guess she's right about that.

I've always been my own hardest task-master, and have never been able to just leave something I've started - hence trying to continue with an option that was defeating me, with all the problems I'm having - but it's something deeply engrained into my psyche, and I guess I'm too old now to try and change it now, though I do try.

I read on one of the disability forums, that people who suffer with problems such as Fibromyalgia, ME, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome etc., are all types that have always been the organisers in the family - the one who everyone turns to for problem-solving, or who is the first to volunteer to add yet another task to their list. 
I guess they are right, as I had always tried to manage running the house, work a full-time job, bring up my child, look after the finances, and be the chief cook-and-bottle-washer. 
That's not to say that my Hubby didn't do any of these things, as he is a better housekeeper than I will ever be - it's just that I felt it was my job to take these responsibilities off his hands, especially as, before I became too ill to work, he was a Tree Surgeon/Feller, and his job was so dangerous and stressful, that I didn't want him coming home to any more responsibilities. 
Because of that, I hid how ill I was becoming, until I collapsed - and, in the end, he had to leave his work anyway, to look after me full-time!

Oh, what tangled webs we weave . . . .